StEPS: Finding Balance Without Breaking the Bank

Hey, parents! In our latest Beyond the StEPS episode, we tackled some big issues with the fabulous co-hosts of Two Dance Moms Podcast Amira and Cayse. Here’s the lowdown on balancing your kid’s extracurriculars without losing your sanity—or your wallet!

Welcome to Beyond the StEPS

Let’s Talk Pressure

Ever wonder how some families juggle multiple sports, after-school clubs, and a social life for their kids while still functioning as human beings? Yeah, same here. Melissa and Cayse totally get it, admitting that the pressure to keep up can feel *impossible*. From soccer tournaments to ballet recitals, it can start to feel like you’re competing in the Olympics just to get everyone where they need to go. And don’t even get us started on the costs—hello, second mortgage for dance lessons!

But here’s the thing: Every family is different, and you don’t have to keep up with the Joneses. Studio directors can help by focusing on individual growth rather than comparing kids to one another. Kids shouldn’t feel left out just because they aren’t involved in *all* the things. So, let’s collectively take a deep breath, stay in our lane, and count *our* coins—nobody else’s.

Studio Owners: Set the Tone

Melissa, who has been on both sides of the studio as a parent and director, shared some insider tips on how studio owners set the tone. When a studio emphasizes social media wins or constantly highlights certain dancers, it can create a “Keeping Up With the Joneses” mentality. Instead, she suggests that directors focus on individual strengths and progress, which can help everyone feel valued.

Parents, too, can model this by teaching their kids the importance of showing up, working hard, and staying humble. Success doesn’t need to be blasted all over social media. Just put in the work, and the results will speak for themselves. No need for the extra noise!

Limiting Social Media = A Win!

We all know social media can be a double-edged sword, especially for kids. One great piece of advice that came out of the chat? Limit younger children’s social media access. It can save them from the constant barrage of “highlight reels” from other kids, helping them focus on their own progress. Plus, it teaches them that they don’t need to be involved in everything to be successful or happy.

Older kids? The conversation leaned toward open communication about family budgets and realistic expectations. Not every kid can go to every event, and that’s okay. It’s about learning what works for your family.

The Power of “No”

One of the most valuable lessons for kids and parents alike? Learning to say “no.” No, we don’t need to do every competition or travel to every game. No, you can’t always get everything you want. This teaches kids the importance of budgeting—not just financially but also with their time and energy. Saying no is a crucial life skill, and instilling it early is a huge win for their future.

The Homework Challenge: Get Off the Field (or Stage)!

Want to make a little progress between now and the next episode? Here’s your challenge: Spend some time with your family or friends doing something that has absolutely *nothing* to do with your child’s sport or activity. Go hiking, have a game night, or do something totally unrelated to their extracurriculars. Trust us, this balance will keep both you and your child grounded!

Whether you’re a parent, coach, or studio owner, remember that success isn’t about doing it all—it’s about balance, effort, and finding joy in the process. Curious about more tips and tricks on this topic? Catch up on our episodes of Beyond the StEPS or tune in to Two Dance Moms Podcast for more insights!

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Catch up On the Two Dance Moms Podcast with Special Guest and Co Host of Beyond the StEPS Melissa McDaniel in “Favoritism & Jealousy: Dealing with Dancers, Teachers, & Parents, with Guest Melissa McDaniel”

Melissa McDaniel returns to share her insights on favoritism and jealousy in the dance studio world!

Melissa M. McDaniel is the founder of Turning Point Dance Creations based in North Carolina. Melissa has a worked in the dance community as an educator, director, sought after adjudicator, choreographer, and more. Welcome to Two Dance Moms Podcast!

WHAT TO LISTEN FOR

• Are feelings of favoritism inevitable in the competitive sports world? Do they increase as competitive levels increase? 
• Are the stronger dancers (or all athletes for that matter), mislabeled as the teacher favorites?
• When are concerns about favoritism legitimate on a dance team? 
• Advice for parents whose dancer feels slighted (relationally or practically) due to favoritism happening in their dance studio.
• Is jealousy on a competitive team inevitable?
  At what age/time frame do you find it most rampant?
• What, if anything, can parents do to reduce/eliminate feelings of jealousy in their child and on their dancer's team? 

Watch the Full Beyond the StEPS Episode here! 

For those new to Beyond the Steps, this is a weekly video series available on YouTube and Facebook every Friday. Each episode features a special guest, and we dive deep into one important question related to health and wellness for performance athletes. These conversations are thought-provoking, backed by evidence-based research, and meant to inspire growth—because when you know better, you do better! We’re kicking off Season 5, but you can catch up on Seasons 1-4 on YouTube and Facebook at Apolla Performance and TP Dance Creations. Don’t forget to like, share, and subscribe!

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