From a very young age, dancers are taught to use the mirror as a tool. Watch yourself and notice what needs to be fixed. Make sure you’re making the right shapes. Check on your technique. Rather than try to match your peers, embrace your uniqueness within the frame of technical correctness.
What this creates is a lot of automatic self-criticism especially when faced with a mirror. And while the intention is to critique your dancing and technique, naturally most dancers start picking apart their shape.
As dancer bodies change through puberty, this becomes even more challenging. You see changes happening that many of us are implicitly told is undesirable for dance.
Shift out of criticism and into self-love.
Rather than fixating on how things look, it helps to focus on how your dancing feels. Even if you have a mirror in front of you, you can do this by turning the attention inward. In addition to turning inward, make sure you’re caring for your body both in the studio and at home. Nurturing self-love also comes when you learn how to quiet the self-critical voice.
Turn your attention inward.
Pay attention to how it feels to engage your muscles as you dance. Notice the feeling of creating certain shapes and what it feels like when you’re making those shapes properly.
If you have a hard time taking the focus out of the mirror, there are a couple of things you can try. First, close your eyes. Actually close your eyes and put your attention on what each movement feels like for you. Next, connect to your breath and allow your movements to develop from within.
Start to build trust with yourself that you can feel each movement, and that will support you in creating the look and shape that you want without the mirror.
Develop supportive self-care practices.
Admittedly, self-care is a buzzy concept these days. Don’t let that diminish the value and potential support it can provide to you.
There are some really simple ways to incorporate self-care and other more-complex adjustments to your life and routines. Conclusivelyl, research shows that self-care improves and bolsters self-image and self-esteem.
Your self-care practices might include the following:
Satisfy your need for routine: creating morning routines that get you excited for the day, developing wind-down routines that help you relax at night.
Connect with something bigger: having a moment of prayer or reflection each day. Get out in nature and find ways to feel peaceful.
For your body: taking the time to have a bath or apply skincare. Pause for moments of gratitude for what your body allows you to do.
Your support network: making plans with friends and spending time on social connections and so much more.
Quiet the critical inner voice.
Our inner voice is developed over years, starting from when we’re very young. It can take on a pretty critical tone as we internalize all the feedback we’ve heard or encountered over time. That being said, you have a lot of power to influence that voice, but it does take time to adjust.
Start to recognize the things you’re saying to yourself and consider where they originated. Think about how you’d speak to a friend in a similar situation or who is dealing with a similar challenge. What would you say to encourage or uplift them? When the negative voice comes up, label those thoughts as “unhelpful.”
As you begin to identify a kinder dialogue, practice speaking to yourself in that way. Notice what’s going well. Pay attention to the small moments of growth and hard work. It can even be helpful to write down some of these positive things you’re able to identify. That will help strengthen your ability to recall them in times of challenge.
Don't get frustrated if you have a bad day with negative thoughts. You've been working on the negative inner voice for however many years you've been dancing, so you'll need some time to change it. When you notice yourself having a negative thought about yourself, pause and take a breath. Then adjust it to be kinder. It takes practice.
Maintain a focus on self-love as a dancer.
Once you have developed a sense of inner strength, created self-care practices, and quieted your critical voice, maintaining those shifts takes lots of intention. Think of ways to reconnect to gratitude for your body and ability to dance regularly.
As you observe yourself in the mirror throughout class, shift your thinking from judgment to curiosity. A curious mind is much more kind and solution focused.
The more you can remind yourself that what you’re doing is something to be proud of, the easier it will be to shift into a supportive headspace when things get hard. Don’t be afraid to reach out for support should you need an additional person in your corner. When a dancer has a helpful mindset coupled with a support team, they are truly unstoppable.
Jess Spinner is a former professional dancer turned multi-certified holistic health,
nutrition, and lifestyle coach for dancers. She founded The Whole Dancer in 2015 to
help dancers prioritize their well-being, find peace with their bodies, feel confident in their food choices, and put their health first.
Jess holds certifications through The Institute for Integrative Nutrition and Precision
Nutrition and has done continuing education courses with Duke University and
Harvard University. She is committed to staying up to date on the most recent research and finding innovative strategies to better support dancers. Visit thewholedancer.com to learn how to work with Jess.